Christians: does it grieve you to be unkind when you choose being right (in your eyes) over being kind ?

For example, when you declare victory on matters such as Proposition 8 in California. You believe you have a mandate from God to oppose equal rights for s, but if you really wanted to live a life of kindness as a result of your faith, it would grieve you to be unkind in cases like that, even when you believe your unkindness is justified. What do you have to say for yourselves?